it's 3am, am i stuck in a matchbox 20 song?

She says baby
It's 3 am I must be lonely
When she says baby
Well I can't help but be scared of it all sometimes
Says the rain's gonna wash away I believe it
-Matchbox 20

well, there's a lot to share about my life recently. i wanted to blog sooner, but it seems as if i never had the chance to really sit down and do it. sometimes life is like that for me.

anyway, not this past week, but the week before on campus, we did spiritual interest surveys. they are great ways to get in an evangelistic conversation in 3 minutes flat. i talked with many on campus at uncw that didn't believe that there was a God, but even now - two weeks later, there is one conversation that really stands out to me. i was with a student involved in our ministry named laura, we were walking and praying that God would lead us to someone that needed to talk. He led us straight to two girls sitting at a picnic table, it was warm out and a big clock overhead displayed the time, for these two girls time is not on their side. we approached them and asked them to help us with the survey, they said they only had about 5 minutes to talk. we promised to keep it at 5 minutes. we sat down, they introduced themselves. fuschia and mimi were there names. laura started with the first question, "do you believe there is a God, and if so, what is He like?" they jolted, "now's not a good time for this, i've been thinking a lot about it." eager to keep the conversation going i asked, "what do you mean, you've been thinking a lot about it." needless to say, we didn't need the survey at all. we entered into one of the most exciting conversations about faith that i've ever been in. my heart broke as fuschia described her life and how she didn't think God could ever be a part of that. she asked me, "do you feel sorry for me because you think i'm going to hell?" all i have to say is, wow. i mean, point blank. the holy spirit in me responded with ease - saying, "i don't know that you will go to hell, one day you might believe in God, besides, why do you care what i think, we're accountable to a Holy God, not a sinful kelly. it was amazing. God softened her heart. I saw this fuschia totally disarmed. mimi on the other hand was a different sort of wild card, she grew up greek orthodox but believed God to be a personal force interacting with us in the world. two seemingly contradictory ideas. i dialogued with her a little about this. at the 10 minute mark, i told them that i wanted to be sensitive to their time and asked if i could get back in touch with them by email to see if they would be willing to talk any more on the subject. they continued to ask questions and i asked more questions. 30 minutes later, we were still talking, i was mainly listening and praying that God would do something in their hearts. evangelism is always win-win. i was really excited about the conversation, knowing that God was totally doing it. this opened my eyes once again for the spiritual needs on campus. i really believe that fuschia and mimi will both one day know the One True God. i gave them the website everyseahawk.com and told them that a lot of their answers could be found there, but to continue the search for Truth.

this past week was a whirlwind, too. it started really hard. staff team conflict on a new level. God was so gracious this week. i've really seen a renewed passion within me for God and His word, i truly praise Him for this! what an amazing thing. one night before i went to bed i was checking my email. i had one from a girl wanting to know the historical and literary context of Habakkuk, i looked it up, sent her the response and then proceeded to read the entire book.

Purpose: To show that God is still in control of the world despite the apparent triumph of evil.

Author: Habakkuk

To whom written: Judah (the southern kingdom) and God's people everywhere

Date written: Between 612 and 588 BC

Setting: Babylon was becoming the dominant world power and Judah would soon feel Babylon's destructive force

Key people: Habakkuk, the Chaldeans (Babylonians)

Key place: Judah

it really stood out to me considering the condition of the world right now, the apparent triumph of evil. knowing that Christ has the ultimate victory is our comfort, but what do we do in the meantime? it seems as if evil lurks around every one of life's corners. so needless to say, staff prayer was alive as we prayed through habbakuk, learning more about how to trust God in the midst of pain and difficulty. i need You. it's a wake up call. it may seem simple, but i'm telling you, once you begin to realize you really can't live this life without the Holy Spirit doing it through you, it's a constant fight. i gave in, and it's the best decision i've ever made.

i've been studying 1 Peter. i am learning so much! i don't even know how to convey it all. God has really been teaching me about how awesome He is. and i don't mean awesome like a cheerleader might use it for a football team, i mean awesome like, i stand in AWE and i don't know how to use any other word to describe what He is doing in my heart. indescribable.

one night, the most random thing happened. i met a girl, teaching esl in south korea who loves the Lord and has a heart for Slovak people. wow, so random. mostly because i found her blog by clicking next blog at the top of the page. i left her a comment and told her i am encouraged by her blog and what the Lord is teaching her. then, i added her IM name to my buddy list and literally two seconds later she signed on. we chatted and rejoiced in mutual random encouragement. how awesome is the body of Christ!

friday night was Crusade's halloween party, we did it to invite and get to know nonCru people. i think it worked. there were about 50 or so people there. it was a good time, with tyler's sound system.

another really cool thing happened, God really worked in my relationship with Matt, He told me so much of what i needed to know. it feels really good to be in His will. i will seek Him.

more pictures here.